Over the past few weeks, several people have contacted me with questions about friends serving friends in ministry.  To be more specific, serving as an armor bearer for a friend.  On the surface it seems as though this would be an ideal situation; however, what sometimes seems ideal is not. In an effort to explain some things about being an armor bear, I want to share a little story.

The summer of 1996 was my first exposure to armor bearers and personal assistants.  I watched Elder Lester Love with great curiosity and intrigue as he served Bishop Paul Morton.  He observed everything and everyone in their immediate vicinity as he gave subtle direction to others.  Many of Bishop Morton’s needs were anticipated before they were articulated; other needs were executed quickly and deftly.

I observed Elder Love, tall, commanding and authoritative in appearance, as he humbly served another man of God.  What intrigued me most was that this man, Elder Lester Love, was also an ordained minister – a preacher and teacher of the Word of God.  But he had a heart to serve his pastor.  Elder Love understood that for this season, his job was to relieve Bishop Morton of the details of ministry that can become overwhelming.

Notice how I describe Elder Love

• tall, commanding and authoritative
• humble
• a heart to serve
• a servant

He was not Bishop Morton’s friend, for that season, he was Bishop Morton’s servant.  Understand that Bishop Morton loved his son in ministry but Elder Love the armor bearer was his servant.  Regardless of his appearance and his own ability to preach and teach, Elder Love was humble; he was a servant.

For the average man, it is difficult to serve another man:  carry his brief case or Bible; drive him to speaking engagements; make sure he has a change of clothes; run his errands.  This is a special calling that is not for wimps.  Your friends and family may tease you and call you names, but as long as you understand your role it shouldn’t bother you.

The same hold true for female armor bearers.  When serving, you are not girlfriends.  One thing that female armor bearers must keep in mind is that men usually don’t talk about personal things but women do.  As an armor bearer, it’s probably best to stay away from personal conversations.

The main duty of an armor bearer is to serve.  Now, if you are an armor bearer for your friend, are you ok with being his/her servant?  Can you separate the times you hang out as friends from your role in ministry when you are supposed to serve?  When your friend receives accolades for preaching a great sermon and all the attention is on him/her; are you secure enough to stay in the background and serve with humility?

If you forget your role and become too familiar with your leader while you are serving, will you be offended when you are rebuked or corrected?  Will rebuke or correction cause a strain in your relationship?  Will you feel left out because your friend is the center of attention?

These are just a few things to consider before becoming an armor bearer for a friend.  In a new ministry or small ministry, it might be unavoidable.  It’s not an impossible task but it might be difficult.

What do you think?

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We were required to read a book that I don’t remember the name of.  What I do remember is that it talks about getting out of our “stained glass fish bowl.”  Basically it speaks about doing our ministry and evangelism outside the four walls of the church.  It admonishes us to stop fishing in our own tank.  It’s great to minister to each other but it’s even greater to go outside of our own church community and minister to people at large.  Some of them will be Christians, some will not.

Not the Greatest Timing

Right now I’m sitting in my timeshare in the Bahamas.  This is my week and I need a vacation to get some relief from the responsibilities of being a caregiver for my 82 year old god-sister.  The only thing that bothers me about leaving for my vacation is that I want to do something for the people in the Atlanta area who are devastated by the floods.  Not the greatest time to take a vacation, but before I left I sent a donation through PayPal to HopeATL.  However, I still want to serve in a more personal manner.  I want to minister outside of my stained glass fishbowl.

My Epiphany

That’s when I had an epiphany!  God gave each of us at least one spiritual gift.  Some people, like Shaun King, have several gifts.  From what I have seen, he appears to have the gifts of evangelism, teaching and administration.  Even though I don’t have the gift of evangelism, I have gifts.   I don’t have to go to the highways and byways and find people to minister to them that’s why God gave us different gifts.  God knew that I would be an introvert and He knew that I would not go out looking for people to evangelize.  So He gave me other gifts to compensate.

Ministry is about serving people.  Ministry is about helping people.  If I demonstrate my love for God by helping others, they can see Him through me and that’s a form of evangelism.  It is definitely ministry.  I know how to plan and organize and I know how to be hospitable.

My Commitment/Your Challenge

Before writing this post, I contacted HopeATL and gave them my information so they can find a place for me to volunteer.  I  also gave them times that I am available to help.  I know there are lots of you out there who can do something:  hand out water, pull up carpet, be a runner for supplies.  I challenge you to contact HopeATL and offer your gifts and talents to help people who have been devastated by the floods.  They don’t have to be people from your church (although that’s a good place to start) just go out and help the flood victims – remember “faith without works is dead.”

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On Tuesday we had a pre-anniversary celebration with comedian Rod Allison.  At the end of his performance, he thanked us for inviting him and complemented our staff and armor bearers for our level of hospitality and excellence.  Mr . Allison enjoyed himself and we enjoyed hosting him because he exemplified what I wrote about in my post, 10 Ways to Get Invited Back to A Ministry.

In previous posts I’ve talked about the importance of hospitality:

• Go The Extra Mile for Ministry Guests
• 10 Ways to Help Your Out of Town Guest Feel Welcome at Your Church
• How to Host a Guest Speaker

On Suite101.com, Janice Benoit defines hospitality in the following manner:

I often am asked, “What is hospitality?” Wikipedia defines hospitality as the relationship process between a host and a guest.

But what does that mean in practical terms? I believe that hospitality is better defined in terms of the guest’s feelings. For instance, does the guest feel comfortable (in terms of location, interaction with other guests, food choices, ambient temperature, etc.).

So an effective way to implement hospitality . . . is to use The Golden Rule. Put yourself in the guest’s place and make sure that you are comfortable with every aspect of your function. Even in party planning, do onto others as you would have done unto yourself!

I chose this definition because it is right on point.  Treat your guests the way you would want them to treat you and it will make you a better host.  The best book that I have read on hospitality is  Be Our Guest: Perfecting the Art of Customer Service by the Disney Institute.

Over the years, our church has become known for its hospitality to guests.  We have learned by observing other churches, taking note during restaurant experiences and reading books on customer service.  If you want to take your church to another level of hospitality, continue to learn and practice what you learn on your guests.  It’s not that hard, practice makes perfect.

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Technology is fast becoming the latest driving force behind what is often called the “generation gap.” While Americans of every age have become quite comfortable with and dependent on technology, a new study by The Barna Group explores how technology

is shaping different experiences and expectations among generations.

Although all Americans – both young and old – benefit from technology, the generational divide brought on by digital tools is significant. The key findings of the research include the fact that each successive generation is adopting and using technology at a significantly greater pace than their predecessors. Yet, the study also shows the exponential reliance on digital tools among Americans under the age of 25.

Importance of Tech

Technology usage is not the only chasm between the young and old. Another gap is each of the generation’s perceptions about technology. Not surprisingly, younger adults are more likely to admit “gadget lust” than is true of older adults. For instance, among the youngest adult Americans – those ages 18 to 24, a group the Barna Group labels Mosaics – more than one-fifth (22%) said they consider owning the latest technology to be a very high priority in life, compared to only one out of every 11 adults over the age of 25 (9%).

Follow the link above for the full article.  It is well worth reading if you are trying to bridge the gap with your younger worshipers.

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A man having a bad day.

What happens when your staff or volunteers have a bad day?  Every now and then we all have a bad day, but everyone is not able to play it off.  There are some people who are pleasant and greet you with a smile no matter what kind of day they are having.  They have the ability to separate the task at hand from their personal issues.  On the other hand, there are people who wear their personal problems and feelings on their faces and in their attitudes.

When your ministry workers (paid staff or volunteers) are on duty and out front, they should leave their problems at home.  If they cannot leave their problems at home, then you have to implement Plan B.  Plan B says move them to work behind the scenes and put someone else to work in their place out front.

A few days ago I was at the grocery store.  I enjoy shopping at this store because the workers are very friendly and helpful.  This particular day when I got to the cashier, she didn’t speak, she didn’t make eye contact, she didn’t smile and she never acknowledged my presence.  After she rung up my items she just turned around and started bagging my groceries.  She didn’t give me the total, she never said a word.  So I asked her, “Are you going to say anything?”  She looked at me as if to say, “What’s the problem?”  She was having a bad day.

Not only was this cashier rude, but she did not provide good customer service. A similar scenario can play out at your church.  Just like at the store, when people are offended or annoyed at your church, you should want it reported to someone in authority.  You want it reported so the problem can be addressed.  Problems that go un-addressed become bigger problems and can cause you to lose members or cause visitors to not come back again.

So, what should you do about ministry workers who have a bad day?  A few suggestions are:

• During their initial training, advise them of Plan B
• Minister to them and see if there’s anything you or the ministry can do to help
• Remove them from the front line and assign them a task working behind the scene
• Explain why they have temporarily been moved to a different position
• Acknowledge them when they do a good job or go beyond the call of duty

Even though the church is like a business in many ways, it is also unique in many ways.  One of those ways is how quickly the church can turn people off and drive them away.  When visitors who are looking for a church home, come to worship at your church and they feel ignored or offended in some way, they will not come back.  I know because I’ve been there.  One of the things that you must keep in mind is that you only get one chance to make a first impression.  Make it a good one.

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